Day 144: Fear of Fifteen

The longest run I'll do before the Half Marathon in April is this upcoming Sunday's 15 mile assignment. I wasn't so afraid of it until I struggled through 10 last weekend, and then watched the NYC Half and saw how fast everyone was going. Now I find my anxiety about 15 grows daily.

I saw a post on Facebook last night about how the Brooklyn Half Marathon was going to close its application process at midnight so I went and read about it. It's in May and the course looks so interesting - through Coney Island, etc. I decided to sign up for it! That way if I bomb (or "bonk!" as they say in running) on the Half I'm running in April, I'll have one month to keep training and hopefully improve my score at another Half. I feel like I need that because at the end of April, I'm going to be facing the 6 month, or half-way, mark in my training!!! It would be pretty easy to say that's enough and just quit then; so I want to guard against that but having another goal already set up to tackle.

Tonight I ran 4 miles. It was to have been 5-6 but I ended up needing to work late, so that shifted things and I had less time and enthusiasm, and ate too late. I had trouble just running at a normal pace so I did something different. I went between 3.5 mph and 8 mph. So, I'd race my little legs out for 1/10 of a mile, and then walk slowly for 1/10. I wore my heart rate monitor by Polar and watched my heart rate go from 66 resting, to 161 running, to 120 walking. Whenever my heart rate would drop below 110, I'd pick it up again.

I sweat like crazy. I wore my new "More" and "Fitness" Magazine Half Marathon shirt which I'd ordered when I signed up for the race months ago, but which only arrived last week. Funny, the shirts were supposed to run small so I ordered myself a large, but I'm swimming in it. Also, it's a long sleeved shirt that was meant for training in crisp weather... but it's already too hot out for it, and certainly it was too hot to wear it indoors tonight. What a waste of money! Oh well.

So, I'm going to try to psych myself up for Sunday's 15 miles. I'll buy a new bag of ice. I'll pick up sports drinks and gel packs. I'll make a new play list - maybe. And I'm going to try those affirmations, too. May I feel inspired. May I be motivated. May I run 15 miles with ease. May I get over this fear of 15!