Today I did my last long run before next Sunday's Half Marathon in Central Park. The schedule called for 6-7 miles and I was determined to go that extra mile... literally. Not because I haven't been working hard this week; but because I felt like I needed the exercise and I needed to prove to myself that I could do better than I did last weekend, when I was crying every two miles, had to stop and turn the freaking clock off at the half way point, and only delivered a 12:28 pace.
Today there wasn't any crying at all. I put it down in 1:19:44, netting an 11:23 pace. Respectable considering my history - and also considering I'm pretty bruised (hip and shoulder) from my fall earlier in the week. I wanted to quit a couple of times today and walked a bunch of the hills; but there were also many moments when I realized I'd been running up a hill and was so zoned out I hadn't even noticed! That made me think about how I'm obviously "able" to run the hills; so the next time I wanted to walk them, I should try to push through at least a little longer each time. And I did that. I also let myself dream of all the possibilities ahead that I hope for myself, and for the people I care about. I dreamed about the book I might write about running, and the movie, and the songs playing on the soundtrack. I came up with a killer hook today! Can't wait to put that pen to paper. I thought about which charity I might affiliate with for the Marathon. That's something I need to decide soon.
I also thought of the jealousy I felt earlier today when I read that my friend posted a great time in a race - and how surprised I was to feel jealousy of someone I care so much about. I worked through that, and came to a place of joy for her, and realized I had just lost sight of my own progress, and how personal each of our journeys is. My friend Amy was instrumental in helping me reframe that jealousy, too. Before I ran, I confessed these feelings to her and she immediately "saw me" and reminded me what running means to me, and how the only person I am to use as a reference is myself. Oh, thank you, Amy! I almost went astray... I really took the time to imagine my friend running her fast pace that she achieved, and let admiration and respect take over the jealousy. I was on the 102nd Street transverse when I finally felt peace about it. The sun was shining on my face and I was smiling into it, thinking, G-d is good! I'm not sure why I was thinking that since I'm not a religious person but, running's doing all kinds of weird things to me so I won't bother to question it.
Unfortunately, today I was under-fueled because all my sport gels fell off my fuel belt somewhere along the way before I could consume them! Ironic, because I was just talking to Jaime my nutritionist about how I planned to fuel for the run, and she approved. So, I did it with a pretty heavy Indian lunch and a latte 2 hours before I set out, and then one watered down sports drink during the jaunt! The hydration belt was annoying today and I started to wish I could run the Half without it. I may not be able to because the sports drinks they give out through the Road Runners are "tainted" with yellow dyes, which I'm allergic to. Ugh! I can't go 13.1 miles without a sports drink. I lose way too much sodium. I need to think about how I'm going to do this and whether I'm going to maybe just risk the yellow dye side effects and drink what they're giving out.
I'm not 100% psyched up yet for the Half Marathon next Sunday! I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do to prepare mentally. I've done what I could do to prepare physically. I've followed Gordon's schedule as closely as practically possible - the whole way through. This week I'm to do 2 x 3M runs during the week, and that's it. I'll try to get lots of sleep, and eat lots of protein and carbs, without over eating. I'm taking iron supplements and a multi-vitamin with everything else. I'm pretty sure I know what I'm going to wear, but I guess I'll have to see what the weather's like. Not sure which orthotics I'll use - the "lollipops" still suck. Wore them today. But for double the distance? Could be brutal! That said, I know I need them. Argh. Choices.
No comments:
Post a Comment